More about my past

Even with all my life experiences, after I was thrown to the outside world, I managed to become someone normal to many people. Or invisible at least, later on.

This world, the one you live in, I don’t know how can someone call it a free world. All these rules, and judgment, and punishment, persecution, financial slavery, institutions. How can someone really be what really is? Everyone becomes, sooner or later, what it is expected to become. And play a role to everyone else, so can be accepted by the others, don’t matter who the other is. That’s something I learned with time.

At first, I was really disappointed with this world I’d dreamed so much. Escaping from the prison where I lived for 12 years didn’t bring me liberty. Actually, it seemed the opposite to me. I was freer where I used to be: there are no rules and judgment among four walls. And I could notice then that I was not like the others. I had a monster inside of me that most didn’t seem to have. My thirst for blood was not “normal”, and I knew that anytime I would succumb for it, it was inevitable. For a moment I wanted to go back where I was and live where I used to live, locked in a basement. The liberty I was searching for seemed to be the isolation.

Later I noticed there was not such a thing as normal. Everyone is interpreting a character, like in a theater play, which is not necessarily what they really are. And I learned perfectly how to play my role, how to fake to fit into society. I got a real job, money, learned how to mix with the others, and most important, how to satiate my hunger without been caught.

And since then I am who I am for me, and just me, free as I wanted to be (and for a lucky few, for a moment or two). At the same time I am what you want me to be, until I introduce you to my real self anytime soon.

7 Responses to “More about my past”

  1. JACK…you seen to be just a “Punk”. “I don t like rules, I dont like being in a ‘cage'”

    C mon…everybody needs rules…and you can t just brake this rules just because you want to.

    C mon, I think that something more happened for you become so evil.

    Or not.

    • As many times i have stated before Bru shut your illiterate mouth. Your pathetic. You post on every single blog J.A.C.K. posts talking poorly of him because he has enough courage to do the things you’ve always dreamed of. You are the definition of pathetic. break is spelled as break not brake. You dont use brake pads on rules idiot and your grammar is horrible. It should be these rules not this rules. Your probably ten. Its funny and ironic at the same time that i posted my email originally to get J.A.C.K.’s attention because i saw it as an oppurtunity to collect more blood with less work but ended in more then one hunter trying to find me and kill me, and several people like me that think we should find you and rip your throat out on live webcam. I truely hope that you do understand there is people far better then you that are capable of wiping you from the face of the earth without a sound.

      Any one whom wishs to discuss their addictions like jack does with me just email me. I love talking to people.

  2. Girly Girl Says:

    This is the world we live in, so fake, freedom doesnt exist, making things to please everyone else, to be accepted, youre right like always.
    But i dont care what other people say or do or if im accepted, i dont care about them, not now not anymore.
    Now i just live for me, noone else, i love myself and myself loves me.

  3. Owlhead0321 Says:

    Interesting theory. I will admit yes, everyone I see seems to be trying to play a character, but people like you do seem to be living outside the realm of everyday life. I usually get put down by people who want me to do things like not write, but I separate myself from them. Your life is killing, and coming back from your childhood. My life is writing and serving the lord God. You are interesting J.A.C.K..

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